Replies to This Discussion

Permalink Reply by B on March 26, 2012 at 5:15pm

maqe !...went to matavuvale website to check a fun blog that had to do with Fijian counting and found this as I was scrolling down the forum...lmao !...for the innocent minds...this what you get when you sio sio the boyz or men online. dau kaya ga oratou na qase.." take your time "...lol. Io dou soli vakasama mai. Victims and bloggers alike.

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Permalink Reply by G!ni on March 27, 2012 at 1:47am

Hi B.  

 

Cyber Predators.  This is a topic we don't take lightly, although we feel that we need to be sensitive to those who have no other alternative, but to "be intimate" online - in their long-distance relationships.  Sadly, the line is very very fine.  In this era of sexting and camming, et al, women are driven to such lengths to keep their men interested.  Fact is, he does need eye candy;  If not his woman's, he'll go for someone else's.  It's a matter of their maturity and senses of adult responsibility to protect themselves and each other from sexploitation. But that raises a different can of worms altogether doesn't it - B?  It's the case of free eye candy.  The question arises, would a man take any woman seriously, if she'd displayed herself - in such a way, where there is no serious connection/relationship?  And her - him?  Where we're getting at here, is the male mind-set.  Some would marry her - which some of our community have done (Girls who'd displayed themselves on Fijian-owned sites).  Some would not.  The onus is on the woman to determine for herself, whether it does matter.  The lack of respect - defined in the Fijian context and the Universal context, and most importantly, in the Modern Universal context - Where does the pervasiveness start and end, and how "accepting" of such circumstances are our men?  

 

As difficult as it is to fathom the cyber predator element, one can't help but lay the blame at the woman's door.  You know he might share the photos.  And with that foreknowledge, why not make your photos tasteful.  Make an effort.  Any woman is capable of having herself photographed where she has a portfolio of photographs to choose from, to send to her man or her "online man-friend," which could still be classified as art [photographic modeling type photos - lingerie/bikini like "Victoria's Secret", editorial (high fashion photography), sports (bikini shots - as in the "Sports Illustrated") and of course the safe playful ones - like pin-up - more along the lines of character or themed portrayals (eg Lara Croft - if that's his thing) - of his favourites, or even sensual paintings of herself - or them together.  A calendar even - daily with "Love Quotes" or monthly. All of her - personalised to him and his taste and their love.  Being tasteful about it rids the stench of the seediness.  All these are easy to replicate - even on a budget.  If he - a man shares these kinds of photos, the woman would at the very least have a credible reason for circulating her photos. It's simply the reality of today's relationships - with long distances.  It's hard.  And it can be lonely.  And the connection is at a high-threat level everyday.  

 

This is odd to say, but we're kinda with you on this one B@siosio the boys or the men online.  Any woman who dares, will get stung.  Men are men.  Boys will be boys.  We refuse to qualify this example as cyber predation.  We're all adults, therefore we are all accountable and are answerable to, and are thereby responsible for our own actions and inactions.  Some women would lose their men if they don't "cough it up."  And vice-versa.  It's a highly sexualised society and Fiji's right there at the cusp.

 

 

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Permalink Reply by B on March 27, 2012 at 10:44pm

Neither should any responsible citizen of any society take this issue of cyber predators lightly. Wether  it be " free eye candy, Victoria secrets, pin-ups or what have you to keep the lust or romance alive in my opinion is besides the point here.

What has occurred here is cyber crime regardless of the gender , age  or  profession of the perpetrator committing the crime. Therefore, the argument that has been made that there is a " need to be sensitive to those who have no other alternative but to be intimate online - in their lon distance relationship " is naive to say the least.

But we all do agree that though " sio sio " is ironically a synonym for  the English word dare, culturally they aren't interpreted the same way. All native children would have heard that word sometime in their life at home . For the natives it is used to alert or show protectiveness for the potential victim from danger, whereas to dare in the western world, we can  safely assume, that  it relates to sexual activities or ideas that is mentioned in the argument above. To be bold or daring gives some sense of achievement or a boost to their self esteem is how the influence of the west portray themselves.

 

The cyber predator element, as is in this case of the female who felt betrayed by the Fijian soldier, can only be based on the legality of the issue. From a legal perspective, any other argument beyond this, is irrelevant.  A crime was committed and he should be held responsible for it.

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Permalink Reply by G!ni on March 28, 2012 at 12:57am

You feel it is a legal issue.  We don't, under the circumstances presented here.   Under which law has the crime been committed? Unfortunately this case, if to be perceived from a legalistic perspective, as you've now introduced here, rather than a sharing of opinions, crosses too many international boundaries.  The primary case as you'd highlighted via your re-introduction of an old MTVVL topic, was initially a consensual exchange, in our opinion.     An opinion, and not an argument.  It's a mere reaction to an online thread.  

 

A cyber predator by definition is broad, when evidentiary lines have to be followed.  Too many he says, she says.  Internet crimes, even when real cyber predation can be proven, is difficult to nail.  The question is, was the woman a willing participant - did she engage in camming, which is very likely the case here, and if she did, then it was a conscious  yet unconscious choice on her part to allow the exchange of adult material online.  What type of sex was she engaged in?  That too can be a crime, if we are to dig in to what is Criminal.  Any right-thinking woman, knows the capabilities of technology, whilst camming at all.  Too many women, have been caught through simple measures via skype, for example, when a guy would take a snapshot of their session.  If a woman knows that a man is capable of taking a snapshot, just as much as she is capable of doing the very same thing, then why cry Wolf about it?  The only problem we see here is, she feels violated if that, and he does not.  Every so often, MFF gets the guys "bits" displayed publicly when some "on the warpath" woman, chooses to demoralise a specific man, or the whole male gender.  No complaints from the male members of our community, of being violated.  They just laugh it off - that it's okay - for we do ask.  

 

Sorry B, this still doesn't qualify as cyber predation, unless of course, you can prove to us that this woman in question, was under 16 years old, under Fiji's laws, and is under the varying ages of America's laws if she is an American resident, and is under 16, under UK law ... et al.  If she was a minor, and it can be proven that she was one, at the time of exchange, then and only then, would we bend and qualify it as cyber predation and that a cybercrime has occurred.

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Permalink Reply by G!ni on March 28, 2012 at 1:04am

Interesting interpretation of "siosio" as "to dare."  To us - "siosio" - conveys "the cheek or the cheekiness," one bears to dare, more like an adjective - pre the dare.  More an attitude.  Strangely enough, we'd never crossed that term, directly at us - as you've put it, but rather its usage to describe cultural missteps.   To us "bolea,"   equates "to dare" more.  Suppose its the differing Fijian languages, which would determine usage.  

 

You're allowed your opinion@what you believe is beside the point, as we're allowed ours, that it is important to maintain the level of intimacy between a couple, who have chosen technology as their means to an end.  We're not ones to judge, what people choose and how people choose to keep their relationships spicy.  Betrayal isn't necessarily criminal.

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Permalink Reply by G!ni on March 28, 2012 at 1:12am

When we are to consider the feeling of betrayal that you've introduced here, we must also be sensitive to the gentleman in question, who may have felt that he was engaging in online sex with a Fijian prostitute.  He might have believed with clear intention, that he had bought and paid for the session, thereby allowing him to circulate what he determined was his property, by right of exchange.  We have to err on the side of caution, for around the time this came up, Fijian-owned social networks were abuzz with Fijian prostitutes from Australia and Fiji, some of whom were soliciting their wares publicly.  There were public bookings of live sessions on some Fijian-owned sites.  We don't know how they'd just disappeared - almost, but they have done.  

 

Too many fights broke out between civilian women vying for the male members of our community's attention vs women and girls who'd declared themselves as prostitutes.  Then you do have Fijian women who own some sex-type sites, where some guys paid to watch them engage in self-play all the way to full blown sex.  This was around 2006, last we heard.  Our point here is, how do we know with absolute certainty that the photographs in question did not originate from such sessions or from online flyer-type promos - these women circulated via chat to the men of our community?  We don't B.  

 

This is not to say, that we believe she does not have rights (the woman), rather the fact that this case was brought to light, by another woman, who'd felt violated on her behalf.  Another person feeling violated visually, does not constitute a crime.

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Permalink Reply by B on March 28, 2012 at 10:39am

I believe the original author of this topic discussion on Cyber predator, acted responsibly wether she had a personal relationship with the victim or not but obviously she was concerned about growing social issues such as this. That is not to fail to mention, more serious crimes that has led to death.

 

Pornography is as old since human existence on this planet. Surely, it would be hypocritical to think that we live in heaven on earth. 

My focus is on the issue at hand. At this point we can speculate from the words spelt out on how the author expressed her feelings. But to use the word " victim" is strong. Don't you agree ?

Every human being has rights be it natural or constitutional if in a lawful society.

I strongly disagree with the notion that this is about " woman's rights", as it seems that one female stands up for another. No it's not. I'm not obliged to delve more of my intellectual thoughts from a legal perspective. 

Cyber crimes have skyrocketed since the rise of the high tech age. Just as new " Victoria Secrets"  lingerie or other intangible or tanglible products that come out to early in the market, it's the same here with cyber crimes. We are just beginning to scratch the surface of a cyber society where violation of feelings and thoughts are constituted as a crime in the virtual world.   

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Permalink Reply by ⓃⓘⓏⓏⓘ on March 27, 2012 at 10:10am

us women go in a relationship with full-on trust.....dats da biggest problem :(

guys like that are very immature....and think the lady would have learnt a lesson from dis

never trust a guy with intimate pictures & videos of yourself =) 

 

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Permalink Reply by B on March 28, 2012 at 10:11am

Hi,

My apologies for the late response to your comment. I had intended to do so at the same time I had replied to Kaline's but had trouble with connection. Anyway, yes I agree with you that there is also the issue of trust. I hope she does learn well from her honest(assumed) mistakes.
 

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Permalink Reply by Kay'kay on March 5, 2013 at 3:05pm

Relevant to topic.  Makes for a rather interesting read [Source:  Keier Starmer, QC]

Today I have launched a public consultation on new guidelines for cases involving communications sent via social media, to help prosecutors to make these decisions clearly and consistently. I have made a strong distinction between cases that constitute a credible threat of violence, stalking, harassment or a breach of a court order — all of which clearly require robust prosecution in the public interest — and those in which someone has made offensive comments, which often will not.

It would be wrong, however, to interpret these guidelines as a green light to internet trolls and cyber-bullies — those who harass, threaten or repeatedly abuse others should feel the full force of the law. However, as an open, democratic society, we must have a high tolerance of communication that is merely grossly offensive if we wish to protect our essential right to free speech.

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Permalink Reply by B on March 5, 2013 at 11:15pm

 Interesting...because of the fact that what man has invented man must regulate when it gets out of hand. There was also a case in Fiji mentioned in online news media a couple of days ago of a 24 year old man accused for posting pornography pictures of a local on a social website. Just wondering if it is the one related to the kind that was posted as a profile picture.

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Permalink Reply by Kay'kay on March 7, 2013 at 5:14pm

Hopefully, someone would verify if it is. 

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